Wow, didn't that title make you think that I have it all figured out and at bare minimum I have a plan for this blog? Great, I got one thing right! Unfortunately, I really don't have it all figured out, and we are still in the process of settling in, after almost three months. To be fair though, I did have surgery in the middle of those weeks, and spent a lot of time in bed recovering. But let me tell you about all the things we've done to feel at home in a new city!
First, I think it's a really great time to announce your use of new pronouns, start diving more into expanding your gender expression, and request people use your childhood nickname instead of your birth name. Oh yeah, if you haven't seen that update, that's the newest instalment in: My entire identity is in shambles, the floodgates have opened and everything is changing, and it's a good thing I have therapy tomorrow, cuz I really need some support right now. It's a catchy name for this not-quite-old-enough-for-a-midlife-crisis crisis. That one didn't feel as authentic. Haha. TLDR; please call me Relly.
But let's get on with the actual content, shall we? I will say, as a side note, this process would have been easier if we'd moved in the spring or summer. Fall is the toughest season for both my physical and mental health, so getting out and exploring is a bit harder now than it would be when I'm in my prime in mid-June. Can't change that though!
The most important thing to me when we moved was to have the kids feel comfortable right away. We had family come and help get their rooms set up on moving day, so that they could start getting their spaces put together. I also prioritized getting them out into the community, more so than me or Jesse, so it would feel familiar, comfortable, and like home sooner.
Right away we walked the neighbourhood, visited the playground, and popped over to the YMCA (walking distance from our house!) to sign up for memberships so they could go swimming and the older two can workout with me. Another side note: for me, working out will look like walking on the treadmill or using a recumbent bike since it'll be too cold for me outside soon, and maybe some light weight machines that I can do sitting or laying down. I don't have a lot of options in this body, unfortunately, but I always feel better when I'm getting some movement and strength-building in. I will end up doing a full post about this later!
I also started planning programs and field trips for the local homeschool group, so the kids could go to activities and meet friends! Between our collective mental health, the impact of three years of Covid on socialization, the constant sickness when they were back in school, and now homeschooling and moving, they haven't really cemented any solid friendships, and now is the time! Ollie wants to go to public school for high school in September, so I know he'll make a ton of friends there! But Reid and Sawyer will be home for at least another three and six years, respectively (Sawyer has said he wants to homeschool through high school, but we'll see when the time comes).
Over the past couple of months we have done so many fun things in the community, like Peterborough Pride the day after we moved, swimming at the YMCA, attending the local UU fellowship, exploring the library, going rock climbing for a field trip, and then setting up a weekly homeschool program for it (which Reid and Sawyer are loving), adventuring downtown, attending multiple Petes games, visiting the art gallery, Ollie has played Magic and D&D in various places, watching the Santa Claus Parade, attending the tree lighting, and getting personal and homeschool activities set up for the new year too! Jesse and I have gotten out a bit too, to pride-related and political events, with more to come, and I started attending a local writer's group, and PFLAG meetings.
Jesse and Ollie will both be back to axe throwing after the holidays, Ollie will also continue D&D at the library, Ollie and Reid will do the teen strength program at the YMCA and then be able to use the gym, Reid and Sawyer will continue with homeschool rock climbing, Reid is taking a pottery class, Sawyer is taking a homeschool art class, and I will continue my writer's group, and endeavours with local organizations. We have a field trip to the Humane Society planned with the homeschool group, and Jesse is terrified we won't come home empty handed. He has a right to be concerned, if I'm being honest. LOL.
Just listing all our activities out like that, on top of all our various health-related appointments, feels really overwhelming, but it's actually a great schedule spread out well each week. We are so lucky to have so many opportunities available here, for both the kids and us adults. We do miss a lot about our little beach town (Reid's fabulous art teacher is probably number one), but we are all so happy to be here in the big city.
My biggest advice for settling into a new place is definitely just staying open to any possibilities that present themselves to you. Being open to trying new things and meeting new people. This has always been difficult for me, for a lot of us actually, due to social anxiety, shyness, etc. but we have all worked hard since moving here to overcome those fears and put ourselves out there. We have made a few friends, and found new activities and passions, and it has really paid off.
Of course, there are still some things we're looking for. If anyone else reading this is a Nogojiwanong resident, please comment with any tips you have!
A metaphysical/occult store! I miss my witchy community so much, and our incredible shop where I sell my spell jars. I have yet to find something similar here, there is a spiritual-type shop, but it's more eastern spirituality.
A safe space to host a gender-affirming clothing consultation/measurements with a small business who travels to do that.
A café/bakery/restaurant that carries lots of dairy-free options.
I know there was more than that, but of course I can't think of them off the top of my head. I'm not sure how helpful this blog was. It was less advice, more just catching up on what we've been up to since we moved. What are you going to do. I guess that's it until next time.
This is my life lately...
Relly
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